While Molly and I were putting the ornaments on the tree and decorating the house this year, with the help of the illustrious Lindy Ebbs, I thought about how each of these tiny pieces of plastic and other materials held some sort of memory for me. Upon entry into Molly and my house, it may seem a bit overwhelming during the Christmas season especially when you look at our tree, or should I say trees. We have two prelit 9.5 ft Christmas trees that are chock full of Hallmark ornaments. Some I have gotten over the last 7 years of Molly and my marriage, but there are a great many that I collected long before Molly entered into my life. Each one of them carries significance and each of them has a story to tell. In some cases the stories are about Christmases spent with family and friends, in others it involves a childhood or adulthood obsession with something, and in still other cases, it involves an ornament or decoration that was just too darn cute to pass up. But in all cases, these are memories that I cherish, and I want to share with you. I will *hopefully* be sharing one memory a day over the next couple of weeks, and my sincere hope is that it inspires you to look around at the things you have hanging on your walls or tree and think about the people who have touched your story.
Today, I want to start off with something that is not in fact an ornament on my tree, but a decoration on our staircase. This is Randy and Ramona. You might recognize the reindeer as Hallmark decor staples. These are dated 1986 and I am pretty sure Hallmark has put something out with them every year. But it is not the date on these stuffed reindeer that set them apart. It is from whom they came that set them apart. Attached to both Randy and Ramona is a small tag with a To and From tag placed by Hallmark and on that tag is a name that to me can only signify one person in this world: Nannie.
Nannie (Mary Frances Smith) is my mother's mother and for those of you who don't know, lived with my family and me for most of my childhood. I would say she was a quiet force in my life, but I don't know that quiet is the best way to put it. Let's just say she was a force. She cooked a mean sausage gravy (one that I am glad to say I can almost recreate); baked fantastic jam cakes, German Chocolate Cakes, and Banana Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Cookies; told fantastic stories (esp her story of cutting a dog's tail off just to prove to a boy that she would do it. Fearless I know!); and genuinely loved her grandchildren like they were own children. While I may not have always liked what she had to say to me, I can say with all assurance that she has influenced who I am in every way.
Unfortunately, Nannie was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 10 years ago and has steadily declined over that time period. She is currently in a nursing home in Louisville and I am thankful that she is still able to recognize me and Molly when we go visit, and I think she is starting to pick up who Ainsley is. God knows every time that we visit that I wish Ainsley could remember all that goes on, because I want her to know this woman who has had such an influence on my life. I wish my Nannie knew that we could have chosen no better middle name for Ainsley than Frances because my hope is that she can become the woman that Nannie is. I also would be remiss to acknowledge that Ainsley is able to have a Grammie that is who she is because she was raised by this fearless woman.
I can really say that I can not explain to anyone the feelings I have had when Nannie has visited with Ainsley and just the rush of emotions that I experience. Whether it is Nannie playing Pattie Cake, Nannie playing Trottie Horsie with her, or the tenderness that Nannie shows towards Ainsley and vice versa the experience is one that makes me choke up.
These stuffed reindeer who are 23 years old this Christmas are gentle reminders of the Christmases that I spent at home with my parents, brothers and Nannie. Those are the kinds of things that make Christmas for me.
Thanks for reading! Have a great week and hopefully I will "see" you tomorrow!
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